For Kim

 

For KIM

BY

MYLES SESSIONS

I’ve been avoiding writing this cuz I am afraid it won’t do you justice and I’ll finally have to accept you’re gone as I am still in denial. What’ I’d like to say about Kim or acknowledge is her beauty. How she could accept or take her challenges with such grace and reveal a smile when so many others could not imagine or bear the reality that she faced every day, that she held in life until her death. Her body may have left the impression that she was tethered, but she never let her mind get wrapped around that. As she let life come to her, her perseverance was something I always admired.

I know somewhere she’s still with us.

She was willing to hear my juvenile complaints even though hers were so much greater and give me advice. She never gave in to the injustices she was faced with or succumbed to them.

She was a great, wonderful, beautiful person with a great sense of humor and always with an opinion, but she never forgot to care or hear you out.

I know you have found peace and it haunts me that I wasn’t there or good enough, but you might forgive me as you always did.

Till we meet again, I love you Kim and I might have been the older brother, but you taught me more than you know, or maybe now you do!

You are very loved, Kim and we’ll meet again but once again, I think you already know.

I’m always reminded of you when I feel my mind start slipping to a dark place and it helps get me back on track.

To one of the kindest people I’ve ever met when I would have been so bitter had I been in your position.

To your perseverance, to your heart, and to everything that made you great and there are a lot of adjectives that could describe that. I ‘m just happy and proud you were my sister. I remember one of your last words to me were “I’m gonna always look out for you, Myles” & you don’t know how much that means.

Life complicates things but you never let it for you, as we all once did in our more honest younger selves before we became jaded to the world. There’s something very unique and special about that. Something you brought to my attention. I wanna embrace that more, something that’s hard to teach with age, but you captured it with ease.

I wanna be a better person for Kim, just as much as for myself. That’s how I choose to honor her as well as the memories. I know all that pain wasn’t for nothing. You are loved and admired by many and will not be forgotten. I hope others will find peace eventually in your passing. I know if won’t be easy as you meant so much. We will see each other on the other side without as many flaws, I hope. You might not have seen your life as perfect, but you were a lot closer than a lot of others I have met.

To my sister Kim, thanks for always being there for me in this life and looking over me in the next as your last words to me expressed. I won’t forget.

You are still with us. There’s a reason this all happened, and we all met, and I can’t wait till the day to understand and see you as you should be.

To the princess, the queen, the bad ass woman you were and all the good things you deserved.

I’ll keep fighting cuz you always did, and your words will always stick with me and your presence will always be felt.

I hope I make you as proud of me as much as you did to everyone who knew you.

Your loving brother Myles……

R.I.P. Kimberly Noelle Sessions

Written for the Celebration of Life March 8th, Kim's birthday. We had planned to hold this in person on her birthday as we were not able to gather before due to Covid but unfortunately that is still the case and the memorial was held virtually. 

 

Kim gets the message through! Times 3.

Three different messages through three different intuitives using three different techniques!

The first time Kim got a message to me it was through a channeler. I wasn't expecting to get that kind of message. Hoping but not counting on anything. This channeler doesn't profess to be a medium and I was having a one on one session with her after attending a couple of group sessions that were amazing. 

I was feeling particularly distressed by me grief and just felt the need to schedule with Lisa Snyder of Integrative Healing. Lisa offers sound healing by channeling the ancients and indigenous. I mean, you have to hear it to believe! As I type this I am feeling the need for another group session! It's powerful. 

One on one with her was amazing that right away she sensed a little girl with curls. :-) Then later on she sensed a boy with shiny straight brown hair. She really stressed how shiny and straight the hair was. After the session I sent her this picture of my kiddos.

She also had something come through like Strawberry field or strawberries. All I could think of at the time was that Kim loves strawberries and I had recently been talking to my parents and that had come up. The next day Lisa emailed me and said she really wants me to say strawberry fields to you again. I was still not getting it. The date was December 8th. That evening I was scrolling through my Twitter field and came across a post by Ringo Starr titled Strawberry Fields about the fact that it was the 40th anniversary of John Lennon's death. I was shaking my head at that one! Hanging out with John Lennon? Go Kim!

The next sessions I had was with Daisy Mae Moore a medium from the U. K.over Skype. It had originally been scheduled for June but got moved up to January. She had so much evidence. She does remote viewing with the loved ones on the other side and told me that there was an aquarium in the room I was sitting in. Well. there wasn't. She said are you sure there's nothing like that? Yep. Then she drew a picture of what she saw. A big rectangle with two "legs" she thought down the sides. It hit me that it could be the huge TV in Kim's room where I was. She was like, no it's coming through like an aquarium but ok! Later on my husband watched the video with me and reminded me that the screensaver on this TV is underwater scenes and it does look like an aquarium! On each side there are shelves (the legs).

Daisy also told me that Kim said to talk about my middle name. That was cool! In my last blog post I told the story of how my niece gave her daughter Brynlee, Kim's middle name, Noelle. She had a lot of other things that were mind blowing and I felt really good about it. She got that we had parrots. She got that Kim sends me music signs. Who could guess that? You can find Daisy on Facebook. No website.

Then more recently, in February I had a session with B Carleton from Angels Whispering Light. B does not work as a medium. She connects with and channels angels. Since Kim transitioned I have been trying to learn more about angels. I never really thought that was something I believed a whole lot in since I prayed so much for my kids over the years and ever seemed to get anything out of it, I had pretty much stopped believing in anything. Now with Kim on the other side, I have found that I have much to learn. The reading was so beautiful. B was able to connect with my angels as I had hoped and even better Kim's angels along with Myles angels. From Kim we learned that she had been to Hawaii. B asked if she had gone there while on Earth. She hadn't but always wanted to and few people know that the day before Kim transitioned she had been unconscious all day. Steve and I had talked to her about it being ok for her to go and she should go to Hawaii and have her vacation on the beach. How incredible for her angels to let B know that Hawaii was the first place she went when she learned how to travel in an instant! She got that Kim was adopted and had a lovely message for me about being her only mom. She knew that Kim loves music and sends me songs. She got other validations that I will keep for myself. Steve and I cried many tears watching it back. There was no doubt at the end that Kim's angels had connected and I felt very content as I had not in months. 

I highly recommend all of these ladies if you ever have need of some spiritual connection. I am on a journey now that I never wanted to be on but it is beautiful even through the pain. 

Next weekend I will be taking courses in Reiki. I hope to be able to help myself and friends and family with light and energy healing. Life is weird. The end. 

A wonderful gift. The best, really.

Before Kim transitioned, we found out that my niece was expecting. My daughter loves the little ones in the family. When we found out it was a girl she was over the moon! Finally! A little girl. ❤ Kim immediately wanted to go through her books and pick some out for the baby. She picked out a ton! Princess books and other girlie fun. 



My niece was kind enough to tell me the name she was thinking about while Kim was in the hospital so I could share it with her. Kim approved. 

After she left us, I did a guided meditation where she shows me that she was holding the baby. I had no doubt about that! 

One morning when I woke up I had a lyric in my mind. Through out the morning, I was thinking about it. It was a tough day. One of the crying in the shower yelling out Kim's name kind of days. After my sad shower, I got a text from my niece, Jenn. 

As I ugly cried, it dawned on me what the lyric of the day was. "🎵Say my name". I burst out laughing. Kimberly Noelle you are amazing! 

My husband is becoming increasingly able to receive images from Kim. He got that she was with Brynlee through the birth and (after she was cleaned up! ) gave her a hug! I feel this as well. Now Kim is off to hang with my nephews baby to be until next spring. Lucky! 💞

How Carole King became a validation for me and my husband

This morning I woke up with specific song lyrics in my head. This is how I have been hearing from my daughter, Kim for the last month or so.
Crazy? Maybe.
Unbelievable? Probably.
Meaningful? Yes.

Here's how it works. I wake up and immediately I hear the lyrics in my head. Just like when anyone gets a song stuck in their head. Only for me, it's a specific lyric of a song that ties somehow to my daughter. That being said, she often sends me lyrics from songs that she wouldn't have known herself but I do know the song. Sometimes it's a silly connection, sometimes very sad but usually very meaningful to me personally. Of course, I'm her mom.

This morning's lyric was 𝅘𝅥𝅮You just call out my name and you know wherever you are, I'll come running𝅘𝅥𝅮. Of course this was super familiar to me but I couldn't place the rest of the song or the artist right then. What happens is the lyric stays in my head all day and either the message is the lyric itself or something happens during the day that connects to the lyric.

I don't always mention the daily lyric to my husband. Today something was nagging at me to tell him. He didn't recognize it either but it was definitely familiar to him as well. He mentioned that I should google it. I have done this a couple of times in the past but probably wouldn't have this morning because I felt that the lyric spoke for itself and I loved the message.

As we were talking about it, I decided to go ahead and google. I found that it was the song "You've got a Friend" by Carole King. Of course! I have always liked that song so that made me happy and listening to the entire song gave me more of the feeling of the message.

So on with my day, right? A couple of hours later I pulled up my phone and started deleting emails. If you are like me you are getting a ton of political emails. I normally just delete away. As I am scrolling down I see the sender of one of these emails and it is....Carole King. That's right! THE Carole King who wrote and sings the very song that was given to me this morning. WOW. I immediately ran to show my husband the email. He was like " What are the odds that this person has the same name". It wasn't even sinking in to him that it was actually the same person.

I was thanking Kim  for the awesome sign and really impressed by this one! It could have gotten right past me. If I hadn't mentioned it to my husband who then wanted me to google it, I probably would have just deleted the email and never put it together. 

Kim often works with her dad and I together to get the message across. 💕

By the way... the song on Monday was from Cinderella 🎝Impossible things are happening every day🎝I can attest to that!

Seriously!

A letter to my daughter 9 weeks in...

My little love,

Every day I cry. Every. Day.

I can’t imagine doing any of the things I use to do with you….without you.

I am afraid of what will happen the day I don’t think of you first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

I meditate. I try to watch for signs from you. I fall apart.

Has grief got such a strong grip on me? Or do I hold on tightly, desperately to my grief?

Does feeling better mean letting you go? I Cant.

I want to move forward, not move on.

But I don’t know how.

You send me song lyrics. I get the message.

I feel better for a minute. And then I am screaming inside for you.

Who am I now? This broken-hearted mom? Or has my heart broken open so I can learn?

Did you plan this on the other side before you came to me? Did I? What were we thinking!?

I may need to hold on to this grief just a little longer.

Even though I can barely function.

Until I can figure out this life without you.

And one day reach out my hand to help someone else.

Then maybe I can tell my grief goodbye

and walk into the light.